Where do I wan't to be?

The question regarding my future wasn't this complicated before. But from some time it has grown up into a scary monster that keeps troubling me every now and then. I'm still not entirely convinced with the answers I have to this question for myself. But then I may not have introspected myself deep enough looking for the "real" answers.
The trouble is that I'm still not focussed towards a single goal. I'm still clueless as to what is best for me. Placements aren't much far and there are hardl y 8 months to CAT, so I'm in heavy pressure to make up my mind soon and head into a single direction. I really need to compensate for the average acad performance till now, beacause I'll find it hard to explain the acad in Interviews if it goes all the way like this.
Now the time is good to go by the book if I decide to go for CAT and start preparing on a regular basis. English preparation has be planned and spread over a considerable period of time.
All this calls for a drastic change during the oncoming months. I must resolve to bring in that change asap....
After all "Where would I be in a year or two ahead?" entirely depends on this....

Paradoxical learning!!!!

I'm heavily confused right now. The confusion that I'm in right now is not just regarding the state of being indecisive. It's something more. The usual parameters that I use to reach to conclusions are generating a conflict, and that too a paradoxical one! Though I've already made the decision, I'm still not very sure as to what have I taken into account and why have I done so.
The most usual factor that shapes one's thinking is the public consensus that's prevalent regarding the topic. (though most of it is statistically uncertain and driven by the desire to point out flaws, but more or less it's always a major factor). Another factor is your own contemplation of aftereffects as per your experiences and with the aid of extrapolation. This one varies largely from person to person and once shaped by intuition, it largely drives the course of action. Third factor is the social and peer involvement, which implants the need to be consistent with one's past record and hence adds a deterrence to try out things that don't go along consistently with one's image. There can be some other factors as well.

The paradox arises when the conclusion reached by reasoning conflicts with the one which has been arrived upon by collective opinion and accumulated wisdom that one has. Which one has to be chosen now? The intuitive feeling added to the chaos. I wasn't sure as to reasoning was absolutely flawless or not, neither was I confident regarding the public consensus.

I did made a decision though, my conscience helped me out of the paradoxical situation. I chose the option in which I could answer myself in the best possible manner. I cannot boast that it's always right thing to do, but there didn't seemed to be a better alternative that could sort out the confusion.